WoT:PbP V Update 1

I fucking hate traffic, and I fucking hate filler and that's what this fucking chapter(s) feel like a shitload of filler.

So the Group of Lan, Moiranne, Perrin, and Loiel go out tromping around the fucking flaming fucking wilderness looking and searching for fucking shithead Rand. Stupid redhead cocksucker is waaayyy ahead of him and we here this over and fucking over. I swear to the bloody virgin mary that I will personall, if god grants me the strength, to rip out these pages from every fucking book and burn them. Meanwhile, we learn that Moiranne has no idea how to catch fish and Perrin and Loiel teach her. "Fishing? Isn't that interesting" like a fucking 18 yr old retarded kid who learns he has a penis and what it's used for besides sticking it in a jar of Mayo.

We come upon a village where Rand is and guess the fuck what? Lot's of wierd shit is going on, marriages are occuring like wildfire, people going batshit, white cloaks declaring that they like women and don't like being buggered by their bosses, Cat's and Dogs living together, mass hysteria, end of the world. Ok that last bit I stole from Ghostbusters but the rest is god's honest truth, who am I kidding. About 20 solid fucking minutes of this prattle while I am stuck behind some shithead who can't drive over fucking 30 in the left lane. This is why god invented guns.

The innkeepers bitch servant has a kookie brother he wants Moiranne to look at, Perrin drags her ass down to see the Gimp and looky looky we got hooky it's a guy just like Perrin, with YELLOW EYES (GASP) and he's gone completely to the wolves (DOUBLE GASP) and Perrin goes nutty mumbling about "Wolves, running, blood, dancing, running on the hills, meat, blood, must remove fur lined panties..." while blood streams down his nose. Moiranne tries to help him while fatboy innbitch looks on. Turns out the boy is too far gone into happyland so they decide to free him into the wilderness to rape and pillage on his lonesome. How sweet of them, they've got their PETA membership cards don't they?

So Perrin goes upto Moiranne's room and instead of seeing if it's smooth all over he asks her if he's going to go wacko jacko like lupinboy. She sighs at him, prolly in the midst of changing her MonsterVibe ter'angreal batteries and tells him "Maybe". "How bout I shove my axe down your throat and then twist and pop your fucking head off and bathe in your blood for a MAYBE!" Perrin shouts. No he doesn't, no male character has a ballsack on them, he just mutters about "Aes Sedai never tell it to you straight." and then she goes on about how deadly his dreams are as wolves talk and work in dreams.

So Perrin vows to never fall asleep and dream of wolves, just like he vows to never talk with wolves, and prolly vows that he will finally ask Rand how he gets all the bitches while he is at it. Perrin better keep track of all his vows, and then he passes out and dreams...about wolves.....